My Laycee

One more long, wordy, serious post for you.  Ya'll don't have to read it.  It's more for me to just record some things and have them saved.

I have been really missing my best friend, Laycee lately.  She passed away 4 years ago, and I still just miss that girl!  I really wish I could talk to her....  Sometimes I'd give anything to just pick up my phone and call her.  Sometimes if I'm alone, I do just talk to her still.  She served a mission to Poland.  There is a great Polish couple who lives here in the Village, and sometimes I find myself thinking, "Oh I should call Lace and find out how to say something!" 

I'll never forget the day I found out she had passed away.  It was my and Nate's 1st wedding anniversary.  I was on my way home from work, and was SO excited to go home, pack a bag, and head to a Bed & Breakfast with my man.  On my way home, I decided to call Lace and see how she was doing.  She had just moved to Kansas.  I had gotten a text message from her 10 days earlier (that I still have in my phone), and we hadn't been in touch since.  I called her phone, and I was surprised when her mom answered.  Why was her mom in Kansas?  Her mom proceeded to tell me that Laycee had passed away the night before.  I could barely make it the rest of the way home.  Nate walked through the door with a dozen red roses, and I just collapsed into his arms.  It was a really hard day.  We still celebrated our Anniversary, but it definitely wasn't as relaxing as it should have been! 

A few days later, I was asked to speak at Laycee's funeral.  While talking to Laycee's mom on the phone, I had a feeling that they were going to ask me to speak.  But I was still overwhelmed.  I took a day off work and wrote my talk and pondered and went to the temple.  I felt such an obligation to Laycee to make my talk very meaningful.  I felt such a reverence and respect for her during those few days....I had NO doubts that if she were speaking at my funeral instead, she'd be giving forth the same effort. We had each other's backs like that!!  I knew her funeral would be packed, she was seriously the coolest!!  She & Nate had a special friendship, she called him "Natey-Poo" and he called her "Laycee-Poo".  The other day, I found some emails the two of them had sent each other while she was helping Nate pick out an engagement ring for me.  She was single, and I know it was hard on her to watch me get married, but she was right by my side the entire time....and she was the first person I called after our Honeymoon!!  Wow, I really miss talking to her, I have so much to tell her!!

I have no doubts that Laycee took care of Cam & Roo (and is still watching over our future children) for us before they came to this earth.  She used to make this hilarious face when she'd eat something sour.....and when Cam was a baby, he used to make the same face.  I always told Nate that she probably taught him that!!  I know Cam & Lace were best friends before he got here....they'd definitely love each other now!  Since she passed, I always "tell" her that she had better be front and center to greet me when I pass away....I seriously can't wait to see that girly again!!!!

So I'd like to copy & paste the talk I gave here.  So I will always have it and remember it.  The funeral was February 10, 2006.  It was a very difficult day.  She was so young, only 26.  Seeing her family and her pictures and belongings....I couldn't breathe.  Seeing her body was nearly impossible for me.  It wasn't her.  She was SO full of life, hyper, hilarious....it was very obvious that her Spirit was not in her body anymore.  I sobbed through the viewing and the entire funeral....except during my talk.  Laycee's mom told me before it started that if I needed to end my talk and sit down early, I could.  But I didn't want to...I owed it to Lace.  I felt a calm, peaceful feeling as I stood up.  My tears were graciously put on hold while I spoke, I felt divine help.  I have never forgotten that, and I'm so grateful I was able to do this for my best friend and her wonderful family.

Here is what I said:

This past week was difficult and brought a lot of sadness as I thought about what I would say and the memories I have of Laycee. But it was also an extremely uplifting and spiritual week. My testimony has been strengthened so much, and I am grateful for that.


Laycee and I have been best friends for almost 9 years. It was one of those friendships where no matter where our lives took us, no matter what we were doing—we were always friends. Laycee was always there for me. We met in the summer of 1997 when both of our families moved into the ward on the same weekend from out of state. We took comfort in each other—both of us being new, afraid, and homesick together. We immediately clicked and have been together ever since. I remember being so lonely when I first moved to Utah, and Laycee was there for me. In high school, we shared a locker, spent hours coming up with plans to get our crushes to notice us, ate ice cream and Subway sandwiches nearly every day. We tried to start going running after school—that is until we were chased by a dog and Laycee refused to go again. We never stopped laughing about the time we spent 2 hours being chased in our car all over Salem by 2 boys in our ward—we thought they were just trying to attack us with paintballs, but all they really were trying to do was stop us so they could ask us to a dance.


After high school we went our separate ways for a few years. Laycee went on a mission, and right when she got home, I left for my mission. Her mission was an example to me. Through those experiences, we reunited and grew even closer. Again, Laycee was there for me when I returned home. We understood each other and why it was so hard to come home after serving a mission. We took walks around Salem Pond and shared mission stories and tried to teach each other Polish and Korean. One of my favorite memories was about a year and a half ago when Laycee suggested that we spend an hour or so each night studying the Old Testament. We bought study guides and marking pencils. It was such a wonderful experience as best friends to spend time praying, reading, studying, and discussing the Gospel. I will never forget that.


Throughout the past 2 years we attended the same medical assisting school, spent hours in her Provo apartment watching movies, went swimming and got sunburned at Seven Peaks water park, and talked for hours while driving up Payson Canyon. She loved to just talk about everything. We would talk about anything from music and movies to our future families and the Gospel.


Laycee was also there for me when I met my husband. She made a point to spend time with and get to know him—even telling him that he couldn’t marry me until she approved of who her new brother-in-law would be. She helped him pick out the ring, and she was sitting in the front row when we were sealed in the temple.

I’m so grateful for all of these memories. Laycee is truly my sister, and I love her so much. I love her laugh and her energy, and I will always remember what she taught me.


In preparation for this talk, I attended the temple last night. I felt so much peace and happiness there. My sadness was replaced with a stronger knowledge that those who have departed this earth life are not far. They are in a state of happiness, a state of rest, a state of peace. I have no doubt that Laycee was greeted by loved ones who went before. I am grateful for the temple and what it teaches us about our Heavenly Father’s Plan for us. This week I have gained a strong, solid testimony that this earth life is only one part of that plan. Elder Russell M. Nelson said, “Life does not begin with birth, nor does it end with death. We were born to die, and we die to live. As seedlings of God, we barely blossom on earth; we fully flower in heaven.” What comforting words! I am so grateful for the knowledge that the Gospel brings to us. I know this Gospel is true, and I know that through the blessings of the temple, we will be reunited with Laycee again. Eternal families are real. Heavenly Father and our Savior, Jesus Christ live.


Close: Elder Russell M. Nelson: “We need not look upon death as an enemy. With full understanding and preparation, faith supplants fear. Hope displaces despair. The Lord said, “Fear not even unto death; for in this world your joy is not full, but in me your joy is full.” He bestowed this gift: “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you; not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let your heart not be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”
I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.