Master of Public Health

Nate's graduation was this weekend.  It was SO exciting and inspiring to watch him walk and receive his hood and diploma.  I am so so proud of him!

On Friday night, it was the Department of Public Health graduation.  And then yesterday was the big commencement for the entire School of Medicine.  Then we had a party in West Jordan for Nate, Megan and Preston (who graduated from BYU-I last month).

Such an exciting weekend!  I never thought this day would come.  But it did!

Now we need a job....

2014 is here!

This year flew by!  I can't believe it's over.

We have been doing absolutely nothing over this Christmas break.  At first I felt sort of bad and guilty about not doing anything amazing with my kids....but at the same time, it has been really nice to just be home.  Together.  Lounging.  Playing.  Relaxing.  NO agenda.

It took Cameron about 9 hours to put together over 1600 pieces of Lego sets he got for Christmas.  Smarty pants.

2014 is going to be an exciting year for us!!  Graduation!!!!  Moving somewhere!!  Applying for and hopefully being offered jobs!!  It's really, truly, finally here!  It has been a crazy ride to get to this point, but we are so excited and feel so grateful for the Lord's hand in our lives.  We trust His plan for our family and will anxious await our next chapter!

Happy New Year!

Venting

It's no secret that Nate and I have had a long 8 years, when it comes to the career/schooling aspect of our relationship.  Most of the time, I remain patient and optimistic.  I have faith.  I trust in God's plan for our family.  I know a "bright side" will come.  My Patriarchal Blessing promises me that.  I truly do love our little apartment.  It keeps us safe, warm, and it is roomy enough (sort of...).  I love my Village friends.

But dang it, sometimes I just lose it.

These sorts of feelings push all of my faith and humility away:

I WANT A JOB.  (Well, for Nate to have a job, you know what I mean.).
I WANT A HOUSE.
I WANT A GARAGE.  (Today we nearly missed Cam's Halloween parade at his school because our van doors were frozen shut.)
My kids BEG for pets every single day. I WANT A CAT.
I WANT MY HUSBAND HOME IN THE EVENINGS.
I WANT TO PLANT TULIPS IN MY YARD.
I WANT TO BE DONE WITH STUDENT LIFE.
I'm DONE being patient!
I HATE scraping ice off my car while my babies shiver.
I HATE hauling groceries up and up and up to my apartment.
I HATE not having 2 bathrooms.
I HATE how quickly our apartment gets cluttery.
I HATE how my apartment smells like nasty fish all the time, and I have to spend money I don't have on scentsy and candles.
I HATE wearing the same clothes I've been wearing for 10 years now.

Okay, this list can go on for awhile, but I'm going to stop there.

I know a house, job, cat, etc won't make me happy.  I know that.  But sometimes these feelings just overpower you for a little while.  None of us are exempt from them.

Today I FELL IN LOVE with a house. It's a beautifully remodeled rambler.  It is perfect.  All of my Christ-like patience and non-covetous energies went out the window, and I sat and stared at the pictures of this house and just WANTED and ENVIED and HATED my situation right now and WISHED for this worldly item so badly that it hurt.  I got angry.  I got sad.  I cried.  I felt guilty for feeling this way, but I couldn't help it.  I'm not perfect.

I felt like this:

Nate sent me a text and promised me that we WILL be done in 2 years.  That made me feel better.  He is working so hard to make our goals happen.  I love him so much.

So I closed my computer screen and went to pray.  I told Heavenly Father exactly how I was feeling.  I told him what I want.  I told him that I don't need much, I just want Nate to get a good job so that we can buy a home and start some savings/investing.  We don't really care much about fancy clothes or cars or vacations.  I told Heavenly Father all of that.  Then I asked him to please continue to bless me with patience and faith.  I asked him to take away all of these bad/sad/mad feelings.  I begged and asked for awhile, and then I promised Him that I would do my part.  Every day.  Keep on going.

Then I read Mosiah for awhile.  The scriptures always make me feel better, and they did.

I'm so grateful for the Gospel.  I'd be so lost without it.

I'm doing better now.  Feeling more like this again:

Bucket List

I'm stealing this idea from my sweet friend, Marci, but it's such a great idea!  A Bucket List!

Looking back on my 31 years, I feel like I've done some great things that would be on my List, if I weren't already so blessed to have crossed them off:

-11 years of ballet, including 8 Nutracker performances and dancing on stage with the Oregon Symphony.
-Excelling at piano, participating in Bach Festivals as a child and playing in jazz band in middle and high school.
-Trips to Disneyland and Hawaii
-Lived by the ocean
-Hiked 40 miles around Mt. Hood
-Visited Nauvoo, Mt. Rushmore and the Naval Academy
-Trekking in Nepal
-Flew around the summit of Mt. Everest
-Serving a mission to Korea
-Shook Elder Scott's hand in the MTC
-Fell in love with my man and married in the temple
-Gave birth to three (large) babies and became a mother
-Breastfed all of those babies
-Managed to remain debt-free so far...
-Bought and sold a home
-Gotten about as physically close to John Mayer as I probably ever will (2nd row!)
-Rescued a kitty from a shelter (Buchi!)
-Learned how to bake bread
-Met one of my favorite authors (Gary Schmidt)

Anyway, I wanted to start a list here that I could update and add to.  So as of April 2012, here is my Bucket List (in NO particular order)!  I'll update it when I think of new things and/or accomplish something, so check on back once in awhile!  What's on your list?

1. Be in a Book Club - 900 Court Book Club, 2012-2013
2. Run a 5K in under 30 minutes - Great Pumpkin 5K at Wheeler Farm, 10/6/12, Time: 27:22, Richfield 2013 Liberty 5K, 7/4/13, Time: 28:49.
3. Run a 10K
4. Learn to knit
5. Get a professional massage
6. Attend every temple in Utah - Logan, Ogden, Draper, Oqurrih Mt, Provo Tabernacle, Vernal, St. George, Payson. Brigham City left to go!
7. Hike the Swiss Alps
8. Write a book
9. Take my kids to Nashville
10. Visit NYC
11. Visit Washington DC
12. Visit Maine (Acadia National Park)
13. Visit New Orleans
14. Live outside of Utah again
15. Bake a berry pie from scratch
16. Host a charity event (5K or bake sale)
17. Visit the Sacred Grove
18. Tour Kirtland -- April 2012 with DeAnn
19. Read the Book of Mormon in ONE day
20. Learn how to French braid -- Winter 2013 on Allie's hair
21. Own a home again
22. Get a family dog
23. Visit all of my Grandparent's graves
24. Own a Honda Accord
25. Attend General Conference live at the Conference Center(can't believe I've never done that!)
26. Work at a bookstore or library
27. See my children marry in the temple
28. Serve a mission with Nate
29. Grow my hair out long
30. Change the life of a needy child or family
31. Read the Bible, cover to cover
32. Spend quality time with my Granny Theresa
33. Create a beautiful master bedroom
34. Take the kids to the Grand Canyon
35. Vacation with Nate on a tropical island (Tahiti!)
36. Read Jane Eyre - October 2012
37. Memorize all of the USA Presidents
38. Learn how to make a Thanksgiving turkey
39. See my children be baptized
40. Hear my children bear their testimonies
41. Have a 4th child (?)
42. Watch Nate recieve his Masters degree diploma
43. Go running at Waterfront in Portland
44. Get my Bachelor degree
45. Run atleast one race a year for the rest of my life (aka...stay in shape)
46. Go back to Korea with Nate
47. Start college and mission funds for each child -- College Funds started November 2012
48. Watch Cam play college basketball
49. Buy a bike
50. Learn how to tie a tie
51. Become a grandma
52. Teach my children to serve others
53. Pay it forward
54. Create a garden
55. Ride a zipline
56. Sing in a choir
57. Run a half-marathon -- April 20, 2013, Salt Lake City Half Marathon, 2:50:18 and Sept. 7, 2013, Mt. Nebo Half at 2:09:03.
58. Give the Book of Mormon to friend or stranger (post-mission)
59. Rescue more homeless animals
60. Own my own chickens
61. Hug a Husky
62. Paint a room in my house blue
63. Learn more about my parents' childhoods
64. Live to see Nepal open it's borders to missionaries and the Gospel
65. Teach my children that possessions never bring happiness
66. Summit a Utah mountain
67. Volunteer at a race -- Run for Boston Fun Run 5K, April 22, 2013
68. Donate blood
69. Beat Nate at a game of tennis
70. Sit on my front porch and drink lemonade with Nate
71. Own a piano
72. Pay for a stranger's groceries
73. Host a brunch
74. Ride Maid of the Mist at Niagara Falls -- April 2012 with DeAnn
75. Run Bonneville from the zoo to Red Butte without stopping
76. Play a piano solo in church
77. Run the I Heart Running route in Portland -- July 16, 2013
78. Hike in Asheville, North Carolina
79. Host a book party

More coming...

Lucky Day

Our St. Patrick's Day was one of the best days ever!

I started out my day bright and early with a 2-mile run with Staci.  I am sick of being out of shape, so I'm forcing myself to do something about it!  Running with Staci is a good motivator for me, knowing she will be outside waiting for me gets me up and out of bed.  We ran on Friday and Saturday, and even though I'm really sore, I already am loving how I feel.

Nate had to work, sadly, so I loaded up the kids and we headed to Utah County.  We stopped off in American Fork to see Becky and her cute boys.  Right when I got there, Nate called me and said,

"So, I got an email this morning.....I got accepted to the Public Health program!"

I almost started crying!  Most of you know the long, exhausting, difficult journey that our little family has been on, trying to figure our education and career path out.  I can't believe all of our patience and endless praying has finally paid off.  We have no doubts that the Lord put us on this path.  Nate called me about an hour later again and said, "I can't stop smiling!"  Me neither, honey!

Remember THIS post?  And THIS one?  And THIS one.  It was such a trying time for us, and I am grateful that we have come out of it with such a great outcome.  We are still waiting to hear back from the Social Work program, to see if he'll do the joint degrees or not.

I am so relieved.  We don't have to move!  We don't have to pull Cam out of school early.  Roo can go to Headstart.  We get to stay in our awesome ward.  We can continue living in a wonderful place that provides us with great friends and close commutes.  Everything has fallen into place so perfectly.

Needless to say, we knelt in prayer last night and thanked our wonderful Heavenly Father. Last year, He literally stopping us from buying that house and gave Nate the very strong impressions to apply to these specific programs.  It was so real and powerful.  The Lord spoke to us through His Spirit SO strongly that we will never, ever deny it.  How could we deny it?

Anyway, after we played at Becky's for a few hours, we drove to Salem.  We celebrated my dad's and Ella's birthdays with a delicious steak dinner.  We had lemon cupcakes for dessert, I ate way too many of those!   So here's a funny story about Miss Ella that made me laugh so hard.  Andrea wrote it down, so I'm just copying it here cuz I'm too lazy to type it up myself:

When we asked Ella what she wanted for her bday she said "a frying pan". She was sucked into an infomercial selling an amazing non stick frying pan! I asked her what she would do with it and her response was "use it when I'm bigger".
 Funny thing.... Last night she opened her gift from Marcia and her polly pockets where wrapped up in a frying pan box from Pampered Chef! (How weird is that?) No joke she thought she got the frying pan! I was worried she'd be sad that it was "just a box" and inside was not the amazing pan. Steve and I were laughing. She was excited about the polly pockets though.

"How did Grandma know I wanted a frying pan???"  Haha, I love it.

While we were in Salem, Nate went to his parent's house for a St. Patty's day dinner.  His mom sent him home with a little treasure hunt for the kids, so we had them do that this morning.  They LOVED it!  So cute.

Graduated!!

We are sooo proud of Nate/Daddy!!

Today he officially graduates from the University of Utah with a Bachelor Degree in Social and Behavioral Science!!  He has worked incredibly hard for this accomplishment, and I am so proud of him.  He decided not to walk until he gets his Masters, so we're keeping the celebration to just the 4 of us...but his boss/co-workers got him a U Grad cake at work today, and we'll get pizza tonight.

My awesome man has decided to pursue a double Masters Degree in Social Work and Public Health.  We have felt the Lord's strong guidance in this decision and feel like it will be a great fit for Nate's strengths.  It will allow him to continue a career in either healthcare or education, which he loves.  It opens up countless doors for him, since the job possibilities are endless with those degrees.  It's an answered prayer in so many ways, and we have felt so much peace in this decision, even though it was tough to see our dream of a home be pushed back several more years.  Having two Masters Degrees will benefit Nate incredibly for the rest of our lives, and we know it's worth the sacrifice.  Having a strong education is so important, and we know the Lord is aware of our family and will bless us. 

He turns in his applications this Fall, and the programs begin Fall 2012.  We are hoping and praying to get accepted here at the U, but we will be applying to a few other schools as well.

This is Plan H!  It has to work for us.  It has to!!! 

But if it doesn't (meaning he doesn't get accepted into the programs), then we move on to what I like to call "Plan H.1", which we both also feel okay about.  It's all in the Lord's hands, and we feel peaceful and excited about our 'new life'.  We can't help but feel so incredibly blessed.  Nate has such a wonderful job with great hours and an AWESOME boss and great benefits and we make enough to meet our needs.  That's really all we can ask for.  Life is good!!!

Top card is from Nate's hilarious boss, bottom card obviously from Cameron!  I love how Cameron puts a W. at the end of his name, he's used to it from having another Cameron in his class.  Hoping he's the only Cam at Kindergarten!

Nate's name on the commencement program...it's official!!!

The New Plan A

The New Plan A in a nutshell:

Nate and I have decided to wait to buy a house and instead use our down payment $$ to pay for his Master's degree.  We'll stay here for another year, save save save, and then see what school he gets accepted to.  Hopefully the U though!  A long 4 years ahead of us, but a secure, peaceful 4 years.

It's hard to sacrifice and wait for the things we want....but we KNOW it will be worth it in the end when he has a higher-paying job with endless possibilities and we have little-to-no student loans.  THEN we can buy a house.  It means more to us to stay in control of our finances than it does to have the 'American dream' of a house with a yard and a dog.  We'll get there....eventually!!  And I can assure you that it will be sweet bliss when we're finally handed the keys to our home.  But we have to keep our house a blessing in our lives instead of a financial burden.

We're exhausted (physically, emotionally & spiritually), and it's been a rough month getting to this decision.  But we know it's right.  And interestingly enough....hours after we made this decision, our realtor called and told us that there were some issues with the sellers, they wanted us to do a different type of loan that would have upped our monthly payments to an amount we couldn't afford anymore.  Coincidence?  Probably not.  It helped solidify our decision, and we view it as a tender mercy from the Lord that we're doing His will for our family.

Phew!!  I need a nap.  Enough with the heavy stuff!!  Bachelor Finale tonight!!!!  Heaven knows I need a girls' night, good timing.  We have lots of good food on the party menu....can't wait!!

Welcome 2011

2011 brings lots of BIG changes for our family.  Some things are certain, most things are NOT!  But they are certain to the Lord, so we are placing this year in His loving hands and moving forward with faith.  I still want Tennessee.  And I want a house (with that backyard!).  But I'm learning to not let those types of wants get in the way of what I really want most, which is for my family to be taken care of, happy, healthy, and for us to be living in accordance with Christ's gospel.

Nater was up at 6 this morning and out the door, looking dapper in his shirt and tie.  Today is the first official day of his Student Teaching program.  His hours for the next 12 weeks are 7am to 4pm at the school.  It will be so weird to have him home in the evenings!  He has worked until 7 pm for the past 3 years!!  I'm looking forward to having him at the dinner table with us....and for help getting the kids to bed!  I'm completely exhausted by the evenings now, so the timing is really great to have him around. 

Unfortunately this means he can't work for 3 months.  His job is being amazing and letting us keep our insurance, and he'll get to go back after student teaching, which is a huge blessing.  So we are just crossing our fingers that we make it through these few months with no major emergencies....like car repairs or medical bills.  Once again....FAITH!!

Cameron goes back to school today, too.  Yay!  I forgot how much better we all function when we have routine and a daily schedule!  I am really looking forward to my kid-free afternoons again too!

My nausea is still going strong, but if I keep the Zofran going, then I can usually function.  I'm praying it eases up when I reach 12-13 weeks.  Cam's eased up right at 12 weeks, but I felt sick with Roo until almost 20 weeks.  This pregnancy has been MUCH worse as far as sickness.  I thought I was sick with my first 2, but those were nothin' compared to how this time has been.  It's been rough, but time has been flying, and I am just happy!

Things we're looking forward to in 2011:

• Nate's student teaching
• Roo's 2nd birthday
• Our 6th Anniversary
• I'm turning 30!!!
• Graduation from the University of Utah
• Nate's new career as a teacher (praying that he finds a good job)
• A move....to somewhere.  Probably staying in Utah for now though...
• Cameron starting Kindergarten (he can't wait to ride a bus!  I'm hoping we end up somewhere where he can....so I don't have to drive him, haha)
• Baby #3!!!  Oh, we love you so much!!!  We just can't guarantee that you'll have a name...

The nice thing is that by about October or so, we're hoping our life will be all settled and all of the unknowns will be known.  My mom gave me another book written by my favorite John H. Groberg for Christmas.  One of my favorite things I've read in it so far says,

"I have learned that if we trust the Lord and move foward in faith, anytime, anywhere, to simply do whatever the Lord wants done, He orchestrates events so amazingly and with such miraculous efficiency that it all but takes our breath away." -John H. Groberg, Anytime, Anywhere, pg 10.

So 2011...you bring us lots of uncertainty, but we know the Lord WILL orchestrate events to work out perfectly for us.

I Still Want Plan A

Well, I tried.  I'm trying.

But I still want to move to Tennessee SO BADLY. 

I pretend that I'm okay with staying here.  But then a picture of our Nashville trip pops up during our screensaver. Or Cameron says, "Mom, I'm so excited to move to Tennessee".  Or I get an email from Realtor Eric with the latest homes for sale.  Or that new show "School Pride" took place in Nashville on Friday (have you seen it, great show!).  Or Cameron will do a puzzle of the United States and hold up Tennessee and say, "This is my favorite state because it has a guitar on it."....having NO idea what it is (that was weird!).  Or if I really want to torture myself, I'll read the blog post from our trip!

Or I see an ad for the CMT awards taking place in that arena behind me this week.

Just the word, Tennessee, makes my heart sink and the tears want to gush.  I HATE that we fell in love with it and now can't go....

We just don't get it.  Why did we feel so good about it?  Wanna hear something weird?  My dad got elected to be on some Board of something, and turns out he gets paid-for trips to Nashville, Tennessee for conventions twice a year.  I mean, C'mon!!  It's perfect!!!  Even Nate is confused, and he usually just goes about life with quiet faith.  Well, we do have faith in God's plan for our family, but I still think we're allowed to feel sadness and sorrow.

We told Realtor Eric what's going on, and being the stud that he is, he went into a frenzy and has been calling school districts and state offices trying to find a loophole for us.  I don't think he can change the state laws, unfortunately, but it made us love him all the more!!  (If you'll remember, he helped us a ton on our trip out there, and was much kinder to us than he needed to be!).

Plan A also included one of these:  A long time ago.

(Cam)

(Roo)

Secondary Infertility is real.  And it's lonely.  And I'm hating every long month of it.  Why did we feel good about trying for a baby a year ago?? 

Well, these are big questions.  And someday I'll know the big answers. 

***

Yesterday afternoon, we took advantage of the schizophrenic Utah weather and enjoyed a gorgeous time at Sugarhouse park again.

Waiting for their chance at some bread.

The bagger at our grocery store went a little overboard giving Cam stickers on Saturday!

We got to stop and see this little guy.....he was SO soft and seriously the cutest thing ever!  Getting dogs was also part of Plan A since every lot in TN comes with a HUGE fenced backyard.....  Cameron already has them named.... 

Headed to the playground!

Flying out of the swing....he just learned how to jump off!

And flying off the slide!!

***

PS.  Giveaway winner posted below!!

A Work in Progress

Some days I get so frustrated that I don't have the money/talent to decorate and furnish my home how I want.  And I'd really love for something in our house to be from a furniture store and not from craigslist!!  I've been good the past 5 years about not complaining, but it's just starting to get old, seeing our mis-matched furniture....especially our plastic drawer 'nightstands' (yep!) and our plywood bookshelves and dresser.  Sometimes Nate and I just look around our apartment, then look at each other and laugh.  We love our simple life.  We know that having each other and our beautiful, healthy children means MUCH more than worldly posessions.  We know it's worth waiting until we can pay cash for these things....but wow, sometimes the waiting can wear you down!!  Got any good "newlywed years" furniture or decorating stories?  I could use 'em....help remind me that I'm not alone and that it gets better!!  "Sacrifice brings forth the blessings from heaven."  Maybe that should be our family motto instead!!

Our home is constantly a work in progress.  We are allowed to paint here, but you have to paint it back before you move out or pay a hefty fee....and neither of those sound worth it to us!  Anyway, I've been wanting to create a picture wall in our bedroom...without making too many holes (yet another rule here).  So I came up with this little display using some of my most favorite pictures ever.  It's pretty ghetto-looking still....I'd ultimately love to have a master bedroom painted light blue and use chocolate brown mini-clothespins to clip these on.  That would look much better.  But this will have to do for now!  Oh well!!  I love staring at these pictures at night...they mean the world to me.

**Updated picture with smaller clothes pins...hoping to paint them soon!**

Nate is taking his LAST final right now....and then he's got his Bachelor Degree!!  I'm so proud of him, it's been a loooong road to get here!  Two semesters of the Teaching Program left, and then we're DONE!!! 

Every day, Cameron says, "Mom, let's live in Tennessee and get a dog.  Two dogs and a cat.  And I want to play basketball in my yard."

Well, August is going to be an exciting month.  I get my man (kids get daddy) for two whole weeks, our TN trip is coming up, I start babysitting again, and we close out August with a bang....JOHN MAYER concert on the 31st!!!  I am so excited.  SO excited!!!

Goosebumps

I get goosebumps and my heart races a little bit when I randomly overhear Nate telling someone that we're moving to Tennessee next year. 

Yeah, we're really going....atleast until we feel like it's not right for our family....which we don't see happening because every day it feels more right.  On our drive down to Stadium of Fire last weekend, Nate & I made a plan.  We're making it happen, and we couldn't be more excited.  Life is good for us!

(See THIS post for more on our future plans.)

You're The Only Ten I See

So Nate & I are excited.  About our future.  We sit up at night talking about where we want to go, what kind of home we want to purchase, what kind of job he wants to get.  Lots of things like that.  We both get excited about the same things...which is awesome...no compromising in our relationship!  We both have the same ideas of what we want.  Buying a house is at the very top of our priority list.  We know we won't ever be able to afford anything fancy...

Just to see what's out there, we've done some searching on high school job openings in the subjects he'll be qualified to teach.  There are current job openings in all sorts of cool places....New York, Alaska, Texas, Indiana, Ohio.....but you know what's weird??  One place has been hitting us hard.  And it's not Oregon.  It's so random, it makes us both laugh.  But we can't stop thinking/talking about it.  And the jobs look exciting. 

Clarksville, Tennessee

Are you laughing?  We are.  But we really feel drawn to this place.  It's probably nothing.  We'll probably end up in Magna, Utah for all I know.  But to keep our spirits high and our minds occupied, we like to imagine that we're going to Tennessee.  I've never been there.  We know nothing about it.  We're such DORKS...  But it looks beautiful.  Lots of parks, historic buildings, close to fun places like Nashville and Memphis...  There is a Riverfest every year on the waterfront.  It would be such a fun adventure!  Plus, there are 7 high schools there, so we're hoping there are some openings for the 2011-2012 school year so we can atleast apply.  No harm in applying, right?

But then things got really fun...we started looking at real estate.  Wow...it's awesome.  We'd be able to get into a 2000 sq ft home, 4 bedrooms, gorgeous lawns....for under $200K.  Now we're really hooked! 

(This bad boy is on sale for $188K....can you imagine??  That kind of money will barely get you a condo around here!)

Hard to believe that one year from right now, Nate will be 2 weeks away from his cap & gown.  It pretty much makes me giddy every day.  He's so tired of school.  He can't wait to have his own classroom.  I can't wait to have this house!! :) 

Really, really, really can't wait to see where the Lord wants our family to go.  The sky is the limit for us!

*So if you could live anywhere in the US...where would you live?
*Did your job/school take you to a new place?  Do you like living somewhere different than what you're used to?