I know he was just trying to be funny, but it's actually a really great thought to keep in mind. So as we've let our recent big decision sink into our minds, it's been a little sad too. We had paint colors picked out and had plans to let the kids pick out a new kitty at the shelter and had plans to spend all summer in the backyard and had already talked to some people about Cameron's Kindergarten teacher, etc. So it's been hard to sort of reverse that thinking back to living here. We LOVE living here, but there were so many things that we were ready for a change from....our broken oven, not having a dryer, the mold currently growing under our window (thank heavens the maintenance crew is coming this morning to fix that....), climbing all the stairs, not having covered parking, the nasty smells coming from the Asians cooking dinner below us, the gossip, no storage space, etc etc.
BUT instead of dwelling on that list, I'm going to make a list of things that I "appreciate instead of hate" about staying here:
- We get to stay with our dear friends and meet so many new people
- No 30+ minute commute for Nate
- CHEAP rent + free utilities, Internet and cable
- Cameron can go to Kindergarten and ride the bus with all of his best friends
- Allison will get to go to Headstart preschool (SO happy about this!!!!!)
- We will have lots of support and help when Baby arrives
- Nate gets to keep playing basketball and football and video games with all of his buddies here
- We will save TONS of money on gas and wear & tear on the Civic with a 5-mile commute instead of a 25-mile commute
- Playdates outside our front door all summer long
- Nate & I get to stay in our current Church callings, which we both love right now
- We get to live by Kristi, Logan & Alex for another year!!!
- And obviously the best one is that it means Nate is pursuing his Masters Degree, which will benefit us for the rest of our lives
So our dear Dave Ramsey posted this article today about moms and money. A HUGE downside to us buying a house right now was the fact that if and when Nate had decided to go back to school, I probably would have had to go back to work. I know that would have broken my heart. I tell Nate all the time how incredibly grateful I am that I have been able to stay home and raise our babies. This means so SO much to me. And now that I caught even a glimpse of maybe having to leave them, I realized how much I have taken it for granted. Here are some things the article said about moms and money, it was written by a mother and the author of "The 10 Habits of Happy Mothers", which I now want to read! It's a little long, but very well-written, and I couldn't agree more with what she says....especially right now!!
"I have watched mothers fall apart when their finances crumble, and I have seen families disintegrate over a mother’s obsession with earning more so that the family can go on nicer vacations, buy a third car, or even provide an Ivy League education for the kids. But here’s my deep concern about money and moms: We have allowed money to have control of our relationship with it. It holds power over us. That’s why Dave Ramsey’s work is so critical. He shows us how to take back the power.
When we control our money, something extraordinary takes place. Money begins to settle into its proper place in our lives. Budgeting helps diffuse the power it holds over us, and we see that we really need a whole lot less than we thought. Real independence comes when we let go of our need for so much that it buys. And as far as allowing our incomes to give us a sense of value—we all know deep down that this isn’t true.
It’s time we mothers square away our relationship with the green stuff. It isn’t a living thing; it's just money. After we take charge over where it goes, let’s work to keep its power in our lives as limited as it should be. Sacrificing time with loved ones to earn more doesn’t make life sunny. And if we really want to live with a sense of freedom, we can open our hands and let a little fly away to those who need it more than we do. Earning more to buy nicer stuff for our kids doesn’t make us better moms—loving them better does. And as far as enjoying real security, there’s only one Being who can give us that, and He isn’t green."
21 comments:
Thank you so much for posting that. I really needed to read that today as I've been sitting here feeling sorry for myself over money and not being able to buy everything I WANT (not need!). I am so lucky to be at home with my kids and I think as mothers we also need to understand the value in that even though we don't get a paycheque the payment is great!
WOW,I love your post! It is so true, I need to not hate and appreciate were we live too.. even though it's not what/or where i would like to live. Thanks for the eye opener and the great money post: I would love to read that book too..
What I love about my kids...
My 4yr old has the best imagination and I love watching him play!
My unborn child- I love feeling him move all day! And the excitment we have to have him in our family!
Yet again some more great thoughts from Becky!
1) Riley- his selflessness, he is always so concerned for other children and about how I am feeling too!; Ryan- his confidence, he is so optimistic and upbeat; Annabelle- her fire! She is spirited and always makes us laugh! 2) Money tip: There's no sense earning money if you can't learn to enjoy spending it on those you love.
That sounds like a great book! So here you go: 1. McKenzie-the best big sister in the world; Daniel-SUCH a big heart; Josh-SO funny; Natalie-spunky, but sweet.
Here's #2. The BEST thing I ever did for our finances was to start paying for things with cash in my hand instead of my debit card. I can see exactly what I'm spending and where it's going.
I will leave comments anyway later when I can think straight (ie nap time when I'm not getting interrupted) but am I eligible for the giveaway if I'm in Australia???
What a GREAT post, Becca! Totally what I needed this morning!!!
1) Carter: we have a special tradition of "Getting SO Warm" in the mornings. He crawls into bed with me, and "gets so warm!" It was one of the first sentences he ever said, and he still says it today. I snuggle him, cuddle him, and I use my hand to push his hair back and look at his whole face. He looks SO much like he did as a baby, I then tell him he is my "Baby Carter" and he laughs and laughs and tells me how big he is. There are days when he doesnt want to cuddle, but I trick him into it anyway by holding out my hand and asking, "What's this??" as if I had something hidden in my hand. He laughs instantly because he knows I am kidding him, and we get to cuddling =)
2) Harrison: Harrison and I have a special cuddle tradition of our own. After Kurt is gone to work, and Carter is at school, Harrison and I run, and jump into bed, and I tickle him and give him kisses and make him laugh. He even made a cuddle song! It is nice, because it is just our time together, and we talk about what he wants to do that day, and I get to give him individual attention =)
Money saving? Um... we always take 0 deductions on our taxes, because we LOVE getting a huge refund and putting it right into paying off bills and the rest into savings. It just feels like we start the year off right. (We also do taxes the first week in February, so we have our money by Valentines day!)
I love my little girl's imagination. She could go on for hours about princesses and scary witches. Makes me smile everytime.
I love my little boy's mischevious grin. I can already tell that he's going to be a troublemaking little flirt!
Money-saving advice: Never buy anything new. We buy clothes on clearance for the next year, we buy used furniture that we can paint how we'd like, we buy used cars...although we do buy new food, new toothpaste, etc. so I guess it doesn't apply to everything! But it is a wonderful way to save money and still provide those things for your family!
I love everything Ava does, she is an amazing artist and has had her work displayed at many libraries around the city.
Money tip....ummm, save, save, SAVE!
I love when Isaiah says "You and me and daddy and Elias all love each other." Just melts my heart that he knows that.
Money saving idea...move up north...no that's a terrible tip!!!
Umm...when I do the budget I try to put extra money on something that already has a monthly payment when I can. For instance if I have a payment of $100.00 going out on something per month - I will either try to double it and put $200.00 on it or just put whatever extra I think I can do even if it's $20.00. It usually tackles your interest faster and definitely saves you money in the end. I put away extra money to pay off our car and put in a few big payments and we saved at least $4000!!
James: I LOVE his caring, loving heart. My husband has recently had pretty major surgery and James is doing an excellent job of caring for his father...not only by doing things to help daddy out but also by greeting him in the morning with a loving and sincere "How are you feeling today daddy?"
Jeremy: Music lights this boy up and lately he has been so happy whenever he can sing and dance. It is just a joy to watch him spin around and clap with the music and sing long and loud.
Money tip: When paying several things off...make the monthly payments to each thing (example two different college loans) then when you have paid one off put that money towards the bigger loan ON TOP of the monthly payment you are already making... you won't miss the money because you were already budgeting for it when you were paying off the other loan and it will help you pay off your existing loans faster.
I HOPE that made sense... I'm severely sleep deprived still from the week my husband spent in hospital... I had HORRIBLE insomnia and just couldn't sleep even though I was exhausted!!
I love Ethan's tender heart...he's a sweet kid. I love Karington's spunk and energy. I love my sweet smiley Clara...she can always make me smile!
I don't have a lot of money saving tips BUT with two kids in diapers I make sure I watch for deals and coupons on diapers....grocery shopping is where I try and save money and think of creative recipes (food is more expensive up here, especially dairy!).
I so needed that....thanks....what I love about my babies...the fact that they are here, that they fought so hard for so long to come home with us and I absolutely love their smiles and giggles.
We play the I love you game often. I work for a bank and tell him I love him all the pennys in the bank. Once he told me that was not a lot. I had to laugh. He likes to tell me he loves me as big as the ocean. I love my little guy. He turns 5 in a month and have no clue were the time has gone.
I LOVE how my two girls are the best of friends and how my almost 2 year old thinks her diaper is a great pocket :)
We use all cash! Credit cards are a no-no! :) It has worked great we have saved over $14,000 in the last two years because of it!
Thanks for the giveaway! I love that my four year old son is so excited about life! He gets so excited about the littlest thing and it makes me so happy. And I love that my 17 month old girl is so adventurous! She will try almost anything and laughs her head off while doing it, it is so cute :) I love my kids!
My money saving tip is going to sound weird, but my tip is to give money away. It has been proven that those who give some, have more. We don't have a lot, but we give what we can and we are blessed for it!
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